pull my upvote

main difference between /news/ mods and north korea? one side executes people for no reasons and puts people in detentions camps, the other one is a country.

How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus? At the circus, the clowns don’t talk.

What did the Alligator say to the turtle? Can I bayou a drink?

[god creating ants] Anteater: finally

*Britney Spears releases a new fragrance* *the other dinner guests look embarrassed and pretend not to notice.*

what’s the male equivolent of a widow? Free

Man! Did anyone else see the result of the Egypt vs Ethopia soccer game? Egypt: 8. Ethopia: Didn’t.

I’m starting a dating app for people who live in Eastern Virginia I’m calling it Chesapeake BAE

We’re gonna party like its 1999. //breaks out Nokia flip phone and starts to panick about Y2K//