Choose a major you love and you won’t have to work for a day in your life Because that major probably has no jobs (not an original)

The punchline comes first. How can you be sure that a comedian has traveled back in time?

The cops did a high-risk raid on a drug operation located at a barn I guess you could say it was a *high steak operation*

What does a preverted frog say? Rubbit.

Where was Timmy when the bomb fell? Everywhere.

What is the difference between the Christmas alphabet and the ordinary alphabet? The Christmas alphabet has NO EL.

Volkswagen How many Jews Can you fit in a Volkswagen? 2 in the front, 3 in the back, and 6 million in the ashtray

What’s the hardest thing about being a pedophile? Just trying to fit in, really.

Sorry about your street cred, black guys named Milton.

I thought I really understood what I was thinking, and then I spoke.