A lady asked me where my adopted son came from and I said if she doesn’t know by now where babies come from it’s not my place to tell her

Read more Ant jokes

Forget hydrogen, you’re my number one element.

I have a pill that helps you lose pounds fast its called the brexit pill

I just learned you need five sheep to make a sweater. I didn’t know they knew how to knit.

What do you call a body builder? Jim.

There’s no harm in trying Unless you try to commit suicide,that will suck real bad

I have a joke about fat people with big butts… Butt weight… That’s not fanny.

A battery’s life sucks. You’re either working or you’re dead.

What’s black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson, after the autopsy.