Are they “haters” or just “people who noticed that you’re a dick”? Check again.

That one. “that one.” says a booy. “what do you mean?” says another boy. “oh, i was just answering your question.” “what question?” “i already told you.”

I’m in a band called Missing Cat. You’ve probably seen our posters.

Don’t let them fool you. Squirrels are just rats dressed in Armani.

A woman in her seventies overhearing that I was a tattoo artist asked if I wanted to see her “rat” tattoo. I said sure. She revealed a bare hip and said “Oh, I guess my pussy must have ate it”

What is the dumbest animal? An ignoraMOOSE

What’s the definition of a will? Come on guys it’s a dead giveaway

Two cookies were walking across the road… … one gets hit by a car, the other one says “ah crumbs…”

How did the sad clown smile and laugh again? They told him his wife died recently.

If two pharaohs farted at the same time They would have a toot in common