My condolences for you and your family through this difficult transition is why my wife won’t let me send back wedding RSVP cards.

After my surgery, the doctor told me I have to pee sitting down. He told me not to lift anything that weighs more than 10 pounds.

Why did the little Dutch boy have to register as a sex offender? He kept on sticking his finger in a tyke.

The best part of the birthday notifier on Facebook is, I meet people that I didn’t even know were on my friends list.

What is the longest word in the feminist dictionary? Antidickstablishmentarianism.

reckon the clouds look down and say, ”look! that one is shaped like an idiot?”

What’s the Boogeyman’s part-time job? BoogeyNAN!

This year for Christmas.. This year for Christmas I got a new shirt and piece of ass from my wife. Figures, they were both too big!!

Why did the English majors switch to Spanish? (OC) Too many persuasive esses.

What game do two strangers with Social Anxiety play? Don’t Break the Ice