There are plenty of fish in the sea. Sometimes you just need a really big fishing rod.

I bought a muzzle for my pet duck. Nothing flashy, but it fits the bill.

A blind guy walks into a bar… …then a table, then a chair, then another chair…

Why do elephants have 4 feet? Because in the animal kingdom 6 inches just wont do

Today I learned two things: 1. Build-A-Bear Workshop only lets you stuff fake animals 2. Mall security guards get to use real handcuffs

What do you call two gay Irishmen? Michael Fitzpatrick and Patrick Fitzmichael

Impotence: Nature’s way of saying, “No hard feelings”

What do black men find most shocking about sex? Tazers

I don’t always tell mom jokes But when i do, she laughs

Opinions are like Assholes… Everyone has one, and some just taste better than others.