Did you hear about the alligator who couldn’t get a hard-on? He had a reptile dysfunction.

Mariah Carey That awesome performance. Update: thanks for helping me get to the front page of r/jokes

Why do sharks live in salt water? Pepper water makes them sneeze.

What do you call Irish fruit punch? A barfight in a gaybar

What do you call 2 lesbians in a canoe? Fur traders…. Zing!!

When people ask “what do you do” I try to seem normal by saying things like “Walk with my feet. Use water. See things that are there.”

Did you hear? LeBron James is starting an underwear line… They’re called LeBron Johns.

Every 60 seconds in Africa, a minute passes.

Who is the best Jewish cook? Hitler.

What do you give a sick horse? Cough stirrup.