Why are they called dive bars? Because they have pool

Matthew McConaughey is for Matthew McConaughorses

What did Picasso and Smurfette have in common? Both had blue periods.

My friend brags to me all the time about the women he has seen naked We both agreed the internet is awesome.

My father always told me, he liked his women like he liked his sunglasses. Sitting on his face.

How do you turn a Fox into an Elephant? Marry her.

Did you heard about the cardiac arrest victim? He was shocked when he survived

Who so thelioma? Mesothelioma

What did the mexican say when a development fell on him? yo get off me, homes!

Never go car shopping when you’re hungry for cars.