rolls sleeve rolls sleeve rolls sleeve rolls sleeve rolls sleeve rolls sleeve rolls sleeve rolls sleeve -Octopus preparing for a fight

Why was the sprout farmer so assertive? He was an alfalfa male.

A man walks into a bar Ouch.

Since the presidential race has literally a dick measuring contest… who would win the election if the election is decided by dick measurements? Hillary Clinton of course!

Then there was the guy who fell into a vat of molten optical glass afterdrinking too much. Just two glasses, and look what a spectacle he made ofhimself.

Why is jumping from great heights the most influential way to die? Because you make an impact

If you have a donkey and I have a rooster, and your donkey bites off my roosters feet. What do you have? 2 feet of my cock in your ass

Why does the Mexican guy take xanax? For hispanic attacks Edit: Happy Cinco de Mayo

I have never seen a thin person drinking Diet Coke.

Why did princess Diana cross the street? Because she wasn’t wearing her seatbelt.