What do you call an snobbish Mongolian ruler going down the stairs? A condescending Khan descending.

If I had $1 for every time I read a racist comment on the internet I’d still be broke. Because I am black and can’t read.

Who makes more money a drug dealer or a prostitute? A prostitute because she can wash and resell her crack.

If a spider attacks you, you should play dead. No, wait… that’s for a bear. If a spider attacks a bear, you should play dead.

One man’s sarcastic answer, is another man’s stupid question

Coworker: Do you party? Me: Well I do schedule two nights a month that I stay up past 11pm. So yeah.

the ideal number of pillows should be on a bed is 6-10.

What did God say when he made black people? “Ah, shit. A burnt batch.”

I really hope my 2 year old daughter is this difficult to get into bed when she’s 18

What did the Mexican fire chief name his two sons? Hose a and hose b