I can’t wait til my kids become adults so I can go over their houses & throw clean laundry all over the floor.

I just ran over a tree, a 5’2″ blonde screaming tree with a purse.

What did the son corn say to the mama corn? Where’s pop corn?

Stop correcting my vodkabulary

I don’t think my black friends on Facebook have the same keyboard as me.

What do you call a mentally impaired French Man that cant say no? A Oui-Tard

A black man walks into a bar… …with a parrot on his shoulder. The bartender exclaims, “Wow! How exotic! Where did you get it?” “Africa” Says the parrot.

Did you hear about the man whose first girlfriend was a dwarf? He’s still nuts over her.

Why do we hire Nazis as Game Developers? Because they’re Pro-Grammer.

Blondes and their belly buttons Why do blondes have bruised belly buttons? Blonde boys aren’t all that bright either.