Damn, I burnt one. What did God say when he made the first black man? “Damn, I burnt one.”

I’ve heard that students in Death Valley get terrible grades. They never get above C level.

Why couldnt the bike stand on its own? Because it was two tired!

If Jesus were alive today…what type of car would he drive? A chrysler (Christler)

Just gargled mouthwash all over my shirt. I’d be a horrible homosexual.

What does a man with a 9 inch penis eat for breakfast? Well, Right now I’m frying up some eggs, got some toast in the toaster and the coffees brewing.

What’s an avocado’s favorite music? Guac N’ Roll

I prefer masturbating with coconut oil as opposed to lotion It just cums naturally.

Bernie Sanders may be old, but he loves modern technologies such as. . . Socialist Media.

I told my girlfriend that brown rice was just white rice with a criminal record… …she called me a riceist