My friend took me to a twilight fencing class. I couldn’t really see the point.

If you see a hot girl walking you should honk your horn to let her know you’re intrested and afraid to talk to girls.

What does the pussy of an 80 year old woman taste like? Depends….

Why do all blacks have acne? Because they all have black heads.

What does a neckbeard call a woman he meets at a fast food joint? McLady.

Sci Fi Films I don’t understand why in Sci Fi films, whenever there’s danger they never send in a Cargo ship. So much for the Element of Supplies.

Ever look out the window of a plane and see a huge target on the roof of a Target? Haven’t these people ever watched the History Channel?

On a cold, late December day… … the wall calendar looked across the room at the advent calendar and said: “It looks like our days are numbered, pal”.

Instructions for having an adventure: 1. Stand outside restaurant. 2. Wait for someone to ask if you’re the valet. 3. Say yes.

A man asked his wife what she wanted for Valentine’s Day: Wife: “A divorce.” Husband: “I really wasn’t planning on spending that much.”