Hellen Keller walks into a bar Then a table, then a chair

What’s an incestuous mother’s favourite drink? Sonny-D

I was getting a blowjob and I told the girl to treat my dick like a jolly rancher…. and keep on sucking.

Women do not want to hear what you think..nnThey want to hear what they think..nnIn a deeper voice……

What did the Asian pirate do when he saw a crowd? He fry through it!

My boss just said, “Everyone dies alone.” I told him, “you don’t have to die alone, just get in your car and aim for a school bus.”

CHINA: how can we fix our economic problems??? GERMANY: how do we reestablish our engineering reputation??? USA: OH MY GOD RAT WITH A PIZZA

I got fired from my job as a taxi driver. Turns out my customers didn’t like it when I tried to go the extra mile.

How do you know all chickens are gold-digging size queens? All day long they’re talking about “buck, buck, big cock!”

One time, a woman admitted she was wrong, but the government covered it up.