What do you call a Gay Dinosaur? A Megasaurus

How is Bud Light like sex on the beach? they’re both fucking close to water

A man walks into a bar.. ..all the bottles fall down.

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back

We’re out of toilet paper, also don’t pet the cat.

I love dead baby jokes They never get old

I saw this lady vogueing alone so I felt bad and started dancing with her. Anyone know sign language for ‘Im sorry’?

If you go to sleep with a itching ass you will wake up with a stinking finger…

my wife can find a stain on my shirt from across the room but can’t see the mailbox when she’s backing up?

So a baby seal walks into a bar… The bartender asks “what can I get you?”. The baby seal replies ” anything but a Canadian club on the rocks”.