How can you lift an elephant with one hand? A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.

what did 0 say to the 8? nice belt

They say that money can’t buy happiness, give me 100 dollars & watch me smile

So, I hear Islamic Mysticism is all you need… It’s suficient.

“Welcome to 9-1-1, Florida. If you’re calling about a matter related to George Zimmerman, please press 2. Otherwise, stay on the line…”

How does a Mexican keep warm ? They use chicken for heaters

I’d kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.

If cocaine were an old cranky man… He’d say “blow me”!

What was said the boiled waters funeral? You will be mist.

What’s big, yellow, and can’t swim? A school bus full of children.