I wrote a song about tortillas. Actually, it’s more of a rap.

Two people are in a fight. Guy 1: “Well, your sister blew me, and it only cost two dollars!” Guy 2: “So she’s only charging a dollar an inch these days?”

whats the difference between girl M&M’s and boy M&M’s? Boy M&M’s have nuts.

What is a 6.9? A good thing ruined by a period…

What do you call a deer with no eyes? Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes? A: No idee-er. (idea) Q: What do you call a deer with no eyes and no legs? A: Still no idee-er.

A blind man walks into a bar. then a chair.. and then a table.

My Egyptian friend’s dad drowned yesterday… He’s still in denial.

I once farted in an elevator it was wrong on so many levels.

Aims at the heels, but hits the nose. What is it? A fart.

Why does everyone hate Hitler? The man was a hero… After all he did kill Hitler