Knock Knock Who’s there ! Chin and Tony ! Chin and Tony who ? Chin and Tonyk !

My neighbor came over and knocked on my door at 3 a.m. the other night. Three in the morning, can you believe it?! He was lucky I was still up playing my drums.

Girl, you should be a life gaurd You so salty, all you got to do is jump in….

My neighbours are getting really stressed out because I keep indulging my window fetish. I feel their pane.

What did the sea say to the shore? Nothing, he just waved. Christmas crackers are the worst.

What did the right eye said to the left? Between me and you, “something smells”.

I went to the doctor and he said “don’t eat anything fatty.” I asked ” no bacon? No burgers?!” To which he replied “No fatty, just don’t eat anything! “

In the words of my dead grandmother…

How will Trump deport the Mexicans? Juan by Juan.

Job interview tip: Bring a box to the interview, point at it and say “I do all my thinking outside of that.” Then open some champagne.