If a tree falls in the forest…… If a man speaks in the forest, and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong?

You ever heard of Oedipus? That guy’s a real motherfucker.

Whitney Houston is 3 Years sober! Wow! Never thought it would happen

Post that you’re pregnant on facebook: 88 likes and 31 comments. Tweet that you’re pregnant on twitter: 2 stars and 491 unfollows

Do you kiss your boyfriend with that mouth? No, my boyfriends not gay.

I recently found out that my aunt is both a bigot and illiterate when… she refused to shop at the local fabric store because they were having a sale, but it was only for muslins.

Riot’s Responce to Sandbox Mode Edit: Response

Why did Hitler visit the optometrist so much? cause he could nazi

For the next two days you can call me Edward… I’ll be snowed in

Can you think of any snake jokes? Because I serpently can’t.