“You are what you eat”, said the cannibal.

What’s the rudest type of Elf? The GofuckyoursELF

How do you start a conversation with a bunch of idiots? HELLLOOOOO AMERICA!

We have a saying in Germany. It is better to have loved and lost than to engage in a land war with Russia in the winter.

Freudian Slip… I got divorced over a Freudian slip. I meant to say, “Please pass the salt” but I said, “You rotten bitch, you ruined my life.” (I think that’s a Jackie Mason joke)

What do you call an alligator that starts something? An insti-GATOR!

Is your refrigerator running? Because if so I’ll probably vote for it.

What did the Italian bigfoot say when someone yelled, “Hey Abominable Snowman, are you ready to go?” “Not-a-Yeti”

twins are fighting over breastfeeding so one wanted to poisoned the other in the morning their dad died

What’s strong enough for a man but made for a women? The back of my hand.