Did you hear about the escaped gang of Jamaican stabbers? Poky mon. Gotta catch em all.

In retrospect, when the cop pulled me over & asked “where’s the fire”, stroking a lighter & whispering “haven’t decided yet” was a mistake.

Rehab addicts go to rehab rehab.

The best place to get pumpkins cheap is driving around the neighborhood at 4AM. Got 5 nice ones this morning.

My favorite sex position I called wow Its when I flip your mom over.

A friend described me as a ‘no maintenance’ type And I have no idea whether to be happy or offended

Q: How many tourists does it take to change a lightbulb ? A: Six: One to hold the bulb and five to ask for directions.

Dear Tequila: We had a deal. You were supposed to make me sexier, smarter and a better dancer. But I saw the video. And I think we need to talk…

Math Joke How can you tell an extrovert mathematician from an introvert mathematician? An extrovert mathematician will be looking at the other guy’s shoes.

Why does a Frenchman never eat more than one egg at breakfast? (for those linguistically aware Redditors among you) Because one egg is un oeuf