I like my women how I like my file systems. FAT and 32

First person to build a clock had no idea how long it took.

office joke It’s amazing how a person can compliment and insult you at the same time. Recently, when I greeted my coworker, she said, “You look so gorgeous, I didn’t recognize you.”

What’s the difference between a turtle and a tortoise? I don’t know but your mother’s a whore!

“Hey Al, I heard you’re constipated.” “No shit.”

What did fettuccine say to rigatoni? Que pasta?

Turtle + Porcupine = Slowpoke

What is the difference between a slut and a bitch? A slut sleeps with everyone. A bitch sleeps with everyone, except you.

Why did Snoop Dogg bring an umbrella? Fo Drizzle.

How is a teacher like a hooker? They’re both pretending that they’re enjoying it.