she left me for good. what am i suposed to do now? “…there ar plenty of fish in the sea” OK DUDE FOR THE LAST TIME IM NOT GONA DATE A FISH

Me: guess who i saw today? Batman: who? M: not your parents B: Y do you always do this? M: cause they told me to B: who? M: not your parents

What did the Jewish Pedophile say to the boy? Would you like to buy some candy?

Please stop telling me how poor you are via Twitter for iPhone

Doctors who expect me to pee on command, I’m not some kind of stunt pee-er, you know.

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother.

Where do you find a dog with no arms and no legs? Right where you left him.

What rock group has four men that don’t sing? Mount Rushmore.

Jokerino Why did the tire pop? Because it retired.

How do you think the unthinkable? With an ithberg.