I’ve never been skydiving, but I’ve zoomed in on Google Earth really really fast.

What’s the difference between a large pepperoni pizza and an Art History degree? The pizza can feed a family of four.

How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony? It isn’t hard.

Dad: Your grandpa used to cut the grass before he died, but now he’s- Son: Dad please don’t… Dad: Lawn gone.

Back up so I can take your picture. Further More. Keep going. A little bit more distance. Drop off the Earth. Perfect.

What’s the difference between Trump and Satan? Satan will at least let anyone into hell.

What winks and fucks like a tiger? *winks*

[in the woods] Me: *rescues a deer from a bear trap* Deer: I have a boyfriend

A police man came up to me with a sniffer dog and said, “This dog tells me you’re on drugs.” “I’m on drugs? You’re the one talking to dogs”

Request: push more paper than a … I need a joke some what related to this. Any help would be much appreciated