Why don’t black people dream? The last one who did got shot.

People in glass houses, shouldn’t throw stones… They should use them to build proper houses.

Saw a guy with flames tattooed all over his face. I hope someday he finds a girl who has marshmallows tattooed all over hers.

Everyday is a good day to walk through the forest, The fact that im dragging a dead body is completely irrelevant

What’s the difference between a Soap Opera and a Trailer Park? A Trailer park has much more interesting drama and less than a third of those pesky white teeth.

Ten words, two commas, a punctuation mark and a full stop all appeared in court yesterday. They’re due to be sentenced next week.

*Goes to the gym. Takes a selfie in front of the weights. Leaves.

How do you castrate a priest? Kick the altar boy in the back off the head

Having Gay parents is the worst. You either get double the amount of Dad Jokes or stuck in an infinite loop of “Go ask your mother”.

Her cooking is so bad, it would make medicine sick!