How do you start a rave in Africa? Glue toast to the ceiling. (Apologies if repost, I found it funny and wanted to share it with you guys. Have a great day! 😀 )

The discharge paperwork at the hospital seems to be expedited a little quicker if you roam up and down the hall with the back of your hospital gown untied.

The One-Step Guide To Be A Hipster 1. Don’t follow this guide.

Did you hear about Divorced Barbie? It comes with all of Ken’s stuff. stolen from /u/LazzzyButtons

Q: How many Russians does it take to change a light bulb? A: That’s a military secret.

whats the difference between cancer and black people? cancer got jobs. (too soon.)

What did the man say after his wife was dragged off the beach by a seal? Welp, seal ate her.

“Hey Evolution, what the fuck?” – Platypus

What do a country singer and combination of and SNL character and Jewish Comedian have in common)? Both would be called Garth Brooks.

What kind of undergarments do mermaids wear? An algebra