The bus carrying the Chinese tourists crashed. It hit a language barrier.

New dad as of today, so here is my first dad joke. What do you call it when you accidentally butcher your heifer instead of your steer? A Ms. Steak.

I am a dyslexic AMA fighter, MMA

Why did the condom fly across the room? It was pissed off

I sent off half a score of jokes into a competition to increase my chances to win.. Unfortunately no pun in ten did.

Once upon a time there was a man. Today there are many **EDIT** Grandad joke. Rest his soul

When someone is calling with your girlfriend… Take the phone and say: What has little balls, and hangs down? A bat. What has big balls, and hangs up? …Then hang up the phone x)

A dyslexic man walks into a bra

I found my friend poking holes in my condoms… Dick move…

There was a groping incident at work. I apologized but they fired me anyways.