I absolutely love helium filled balloons. I can’t speak highly enough about them.

What do you get when you cross a German and a Mexican? A beanerschnitzel

A PhD in Fencing would be pretty useful… … if you ever had a backgarden dispute with a neighbor.

So excited that The Weather Channel picked up “Weather” for another season!!

I said “You’re not the boss of me” to my boss and it came true.

Why is Santa so jolly? Because he knows where all the naughty girls live. Happy Holidays Fun!

An angry wife storms up to her husband. Wife: Our son just called me a bitch. Husband: That son of a bitch!

The chameleon couldn’t change colors when the time was right… I guess he had a reptile dysfunction.

Im not white im Jewish..

Women are like campfires. Beautiful, hot, smell great, warm your heart. And, both don’t like it if you pee on them. Mostly.