Google just threw a drink in my face I deserved it I have no business asking those questions

How did the barber win the race? He knew a short cut.

Why did the investment banker leave her husband? She was losing interest.

Why haven’t any subscribers to r/TheRedPill played Overwatch yet? They don’t play the beta.

Why do Scottish men have long skinny dicks? Because they’re tight fisted wankers.

When I’ve had a bad day I remind myself that I’m a straight white guy. Then I high five some dudes and we destroy an ecosystem or some shit.

Last year I ate out alone on Valentine’s Day. To avoid embarrassment, I yacked the whole time with a lovely couple the next table over.

how do you get a cat to say like a chicken freeze it and bang it against the table and it says: gog gog gog

My friend told his girlfriend that he wants lots of children It’s pretty messed up how excited she got about dating a pedophile.

Sign Driving through a residential area, saw a sign: SLOW Children Playing! I thought to myself “Gosh, that’s a bit cruel!”