Why is there cotton on top of the pills inside a pill bottle? To remind black people they picked cotton before they sold drugs.

The Seven Wonders of the ancient world were: Chuck Norris’ left and right hands, his left and right feet, his belly button, his liver, and his beard.

Why are all Blackberry workers so bad at basketball? Because the always hit the RIM!

I accidentally washed a black sock in with my whites and everything came out fine, so I totally get that whole “I Have a Dream” thing now.

How many pornstars does it take to screw a light bulb? Nobody knows, they keep cutting themselves. PS: original joke

It would be nice to have a second button beside the ‘snooze’ that emails your boss that you aren’t coming in today.

IamA former Backpage massage girl – AMA!

My das always used to eat rabbit before he went for a run – he said it made him go faster Really, it just put a little more of a hop in his step

What do you call someone who masturbates a lot? A nutcracker.

Doctor then says to Pagliacci… “New treatment. Get on stage and forget vagueness and uncertainty, or else the twelve guys I’ve already sent to go see you are going to fucking kill themselves.”