What did the mentally handicapped kid get on his math test? Drool

What do you call a coked-up Iron Man? Steel Man.

Knock Knock Who’s there ! Abbey ! Abbey who ? Abbey stung me on the nose !

I think it’s pretty cool Chinese people made a language made entirely out of tattoos.

My mom was the best mom. I hope your mom spends today thinking about what she could’ve done to get on my mom’s level.

Why did New York get all the lawyers, and New Jersey all the toxic waste sites? New Jersey picked first.

Two goldfish are alone in a tank, One says to the other one, “have any idea how to drive this thing?”

[Scene: Cloud City. Two men fight each other with lightsabers] Mario: You-a kill my father! Wario: No. I am-a your father. Mario: Mama-mia!

50% of Indian Roads are filled up with holes. And the rest are filled up with Assholes !!

Commissioner Gordon: It says here that bats sleep upside down and wee over themselves. Batman: We also poop. CG: We? B: They. I mean they