Why don’t pc gamers get laid Because they’re micro-soft

Let my son leave the house today wearing a striped shirt and plaid shorts. I’m done, he’s natural selections problem now.

Jesus only had 12 followers, also one sold him out to die and another unfollowed Him right before He died. So I guess I’m not doing too bad.

I loaned my friend $15K for plastic surgery… And now I don’t know what he looks like.

Make a birthday wish for mutant lung power then blow away your cake, your party guests, your house, car, trees, etc.

It’s not so much that I love karate as it is that I hate boards.

What did the terrorist say when he woke up? It was Allah dream.

How do we know that God isn’t a woman? Because we’re not all sandwiches

How did Jared lose all that weight eating at Subway? He just ordered off the children’s menu.

What do you have to use to check a test on Telemarketing? A Scamtron.