There are eleven types of people in the world… those who understand binary, and ten other types of people.

How does a gay forester calls his diary where he keeps account of all his affairs? A heath ledger

I used to be addicted to the “Hokey Pokey” song, I couldn’t stop listening to it again and again and again… But I turned myself around.

Why do dogs run in circles ? Because its hard to run in squares !

The police came to my house looking for a child molester… I guess I wasn’t supposed to volunteer.

You must be a magnetic monopole because all I get from you is attraction.

Why can’t you starve in the desert? Because of all the sandwiches there.

Cheesy joke What did the big cheese round say to the baby cheese round? Getting older isn’t going to make you the big cheese.

Fitness tip: It’s absolutely crucial to take “rest days” when working out so you don’t get hurt. I’ve recently taken over 300 of them.

Politics isn’t confusing. You have a choice of being screwed by one of two gorillas and one is considerate enough to use lube. Now choose.