Donald Trump could very well be our next President. Laugh, because it’s a joke, guys. Guys? Guys! …It’s not funny anymore…

Everytime I close my eyes, I think of you… ‘cuz damn..It’s sooo black just like you, nikah! — I’m sorry…

I still don’t understand why people say marriage is so hard when I’ve successfully completed 2 of them…

What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? Pumpkin Pi

At the disco last night. They played twist. I did the twist. They played jump. I jumped. They played come on Eileen. I got kicked out.

The fact that Fred Flintsone ate brontosaurus burgers seems less charming when you realize Dino was also a brontosaurus.

Want to read a joke about pizza? Never-mind, it’s too cheesy!

My girlfriend said things needed spicing up a bit in the bedroom, so she introduced me to pegging. It did the trick we’ve been together ten years now. Give or take.

You know what the difference is between an chickpea and a garbanzo bean? I wouldn’t pay $100 to have a garbanzo bean on my face.

What do you call horse hay from Mexico Jose