Why can’t you eat soup in the Matrix… Because there is no spoon….

Where do polar bears go to deposit money? A snowbank

(My mother’s proudest creation) What do you call it when you lobotomize terrorists? Simplifying Radicals. Yes, she’s a math teacher.

Today is the day I go back to the gym. Tomorrow is when I stop telling lies.

Keyboard Humor. Finds a ESC key from a keyboard on the floor, make the shity pun; “the Esc key escaped.”

Two men were out hunting together… (Joke made into a video) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4M3rgkpx3Lc

What does train tracks and breast have in common? They are both ment for boys but in the end it’s the men who plays with them

My son just complained about how far the guy in his video game has to walk. We take our lazy seriously around here.

One day I hope to be doing so well that people accuse me of being a clone

If isis gets bombed They’ll be called waswas