Don’t worry, Pope Benedict XVI, I get it. Mondays make me want to quit my job too.

What’s the difference between a French Knight and my friend with a genie? One’s a Paladin, and the other’s my pal Alladin

I don’t think The Proclaimers realized how far 500 miles really is.

Islamophobia caused by baby sheep? Yes it is… Credit to Newsjack BBC for this one.

What do you call a nosy pepper? Jalapeno Business! (say with sass)

There sure are a lot of hot Canadian chicks on Twitter….if I knew Canadian, I would totally hit on them.

“You are what you eat” I chant furiously, shoving another roach in my mouth. Mushroom clouds keep growing in the distance

How many tumblr users does it take to change a lightbulb? Light is triggering, shitlord. DOWN WITH THE BULBTRIARCHY

9/10 men said they like women with curves The tenth one liked the other 9 guys.

Babe Ruth points at a toilet, then takes a gigantic dump in it.