What does Reddit need? Ahmad.

Do you know how Rihanna can tell when Chris has been cheating on her? He has someone else’s lipstick on his knuckles.

There’s a thin line between “I should tweet about that” and “I should talk to a therapist about that.”

What do cannonballs do when they fall in love? They make bbs

You’ve taken 3 pregnancy tests this month. “What’s your point” My point is that your shoplifting is odd and out of control Eric.

Today I saw a baby who had put on five stone in weight in two weeks by drinking elephant’s milk. Whose baby was it? The elephant’s!

What did Darth Vader say to the Internet? May the force e-with you.

How do you call a robber in a suit of armor? A thief in the knight

Why does the baker have so many loaves? Because they bred.

Why doesn’t Oedipus swear? Because he kisses his mum with that mouth.