What’s the Italian word for suppository? Innuendo

What is the difference between a cult and a religion? Popularity.

“I am going on a trip.” “Mushrooms or acid?”

I bought theater food once. Long story short my son will no longer be going to college..

Why do power lines hum? Because they don’t know the words.

People used to say I would never get over my obsession with Phil Collins…. Well, take a look at me now!

What did the necrophile say to his ex-girlfriend? “I only loved you for your body!”

Mary had a little sheep and with the sheep she went to sleep. The sheep turned out to be a ram so Mary had a little lamb.

Kid: What’s a man? Dad: A man is who loves unconditionally , cares about you and protects you. Kid: When i grow up, I’ll be a man like mom

It’s fun to park next to that car that’s parked far away so that no one will park next to it.