Knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock knock -Who’s there? -The plane captain.

What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Someone else’s cheese.

What’s the difference between a Greyhound station and a lobster with a boob job? One’s a crusty bus station, the other’s a busty crustacean.

The last time I was inside a woman was when I went to the Statue of Liberty.

How do you get a fat girl into bed? Piece of cake

Getting married for sex… is like flying on an airplane for food.

Why would someone in jail want to catch the measles? So he could break out.

Apparently John Cena is going to miss 6-9 months of wrestling. Now you really can’t see him.

Getting straight “A”s does not guarantee success, but plenty of evidence shows that not getting “A”s doesn’t preclude it.

Why do Indians hate snow? It’s white and it’s on their land.