I don’t usually make anal sex jokes… …butt fuck it

Why do ladies prefer 77 over 69? Because it’s eight more.

How do you call a man without a body and a nose? Nobody knows. Sorry if it is a repost

A teen is telling his parents what he wants to major in “I want to be a history major,” he says. The dad responds, “No you don’t! There’s no future in it!”

“Then, the handsome prince sees her dead body laying there and has to kiss her.” “Ummm, what?” “Trust me, the kids will love it.”

The first guy to ever throw water at girl in a white shirt probably broke the record for the number of high-fives received in one minute.

I’ve been happily married for four years -out of a total of 10.

What’s black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson falling down the stairs.

M&Ms should change their packaging. They should make it a white wrapper.

What did the diligent whore get for Christmas? lots and lots of karma