Q: What is the difference between a hog and a man? A: A hog doesn’t have to sit in a bar and buy drinks all night just so he can f*** some pig.

What do you call a letter that was sent to a man by a feminist? Hate male.

“8. I have 8 condoms full of hummus taped to my person right now. Anyway, enough about me, can I get you folks started with an appetizer?”

Poor Brain… It got to named itself, but was dyslexic, so Brian it was not.

MONDAY Y U NO FUN FUN FUN LIKE FRIDAY?

Why did George Washington leave office after his second term. He wanted to set a president.

What do you call a plane with a muslim on it? Death row

How many Chinese people does it take to change a light bulb? Only one but he has to manufacture it first.

Andy was away from school for 2 days because he had a flu. On the third day when he went back to school his teacher told him how he felt. I feel with my hands Miss !

i’ll never forget what my Grandad said to me just before he kicked the bucket “Grandson… how far do you think I can kick this bucket?”