Roses are red… Our flag is too Raise your hand to the sky And gas all the jews

Some people call it anal bleaching, but I prefer to call it changing my ring tone.

Coworker: My arms are killing me from hoeing in my garden this weekend. Me: Thanks but I’d rather not hear about your sex life.

What do you call a dog with no legs and brass balls? Sparky

BARNES: “What if it wasn’t just empty cabinets?” NOBLE: “Let’s sell books!” AND: “This is why we make such a great team.”

Chick Peas and everyone wants to watch.

Did you hear the one about the dude who married an exhibitionist? He saw his wife flash before his eyes.

What do you call a sudden fart? An institute.

“Mommy, mommy! Can I lick the bowl?” “No, flush it like everyone else”

What do you do with a sick boat? Take it to the dock.