What’s the cheapest meat to buy? Deer balls. They’re under a buck.

What did the leper say… What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip!

So someone decided to offer a million pounds to the first Irishman who could learn to swim… A Scotsman ended up winning.

Right off the bat Cinderella knows she’s marrying a prince with a serious foot fetish.

He says I’m cute when I’m mad. Well he has no idea of how gorgeous I can be.

I was surprised that my Christian clothing company is extremely popular with transvestites. As it turns out, they love Cross Dressing.

Introverts don’t get ready for a party. They gather strength for a party.

My kid’s favorite joke right now: Knock knock. Who’s there? I eat mop. … omg that is SO gross

What is Bruce Lee’s beverage of choice? WATAAAAAR

I try to keep it gangster, so I just walked into the grocery store and shouted “Scuze me! Could you direct me to the motha fuckin bakery?!”