Did you hear about the pathological liar who went to see the doctor for constipation? He was full of shit

What do you call a blonde Jew? Goldie Lox (my little sis just came up with this…or so she said)

50 Shades He slowly but firmly grabs my throat. I try to say goodbye and I choke. I try to walk away and I stumble…’ – 50 Shades of Macy Gray.

My wife used to make meals that would make Martha Stewart jealous. Then she joined Twitter… Now I’m lucky if she buys cereal.

Banana & Holes! Monkeys And Girls r same, Because They fight only for BANANA ! Boys And Rats are same, They are Always Searching for new holes..! 😉

Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad Dressing

How do Rabbis make money? They keep the tips.

A single word can make a heart open. That word is “scalpel.”

What is an astronaut’s favorite meal? Launch

Mythology gags, anyone? What can kill you with a glance and goes “Hittthhh”? The Basilisp.