How do you get to a position of power in a science lab? Work over time

A Jew with a boner runs into a wall He breaks his nose

A colorblind person logged onto Facebook the day SCOTUS legalized gay marriage… “Hey everyone, why are you all advertising for ’50 Shades of Grey’?”

Karma is my daughter bragging about getting to sleep late this week and forgetting to turn off her alarm.

If your wife walks in and turns the light on while you’re staring at the ceiling, make sure you yell “My eyes!” BEFORE she starts changing

Funny jokes for kids http://kids-funny-jokes.blogspot.com

[NSFW] Why does Santa have such a big sack? He only comes once a year.

I wasn’t sure about having sex with aliens Butt fuck ‘et

Love is like Wi-Fi You can’t see it, but you’ll know when you lose it.

Had a fight with a one dimensional entity yesterday… The outcome was pretty one sided.