I secretly bought some new trousers without telling my girlfriend Do you think chinos?

Make love to a woman’s mind, and her body will follow in kind

Did you here about the priest? He broke his organ on a hymn

Just saw The Martian. If Matt Damon was alone on Mars, who was filming him that whole time? Clearly fake

Where do intergalactic keyboards go to drink? Space Bars

Spare ticket for Dynamo next Thursday They all Shocked to looked

I was going to castrate myself But I didn’t have the balls.

Rock around the winter clock One, two, three o’ clock, two o’ clock rock!

What do you call a deaf quadriplegic? Whatever you want

In history class we got to read on a WW2 topic of our choice. I chose the Manhattan Project. I heard it was the bomb.