Threesome fun!!! I had planned a threesome, but there were two no shows. I still had fun though!!!

imagine a reverse pizza. the missing hole on the table where the pizza is meant to be. everything else is pizza. the solar system. the air.

What did the lecherous Sufi say to the burkini fatso? Ouagadougou

What’s brown and sticky? My poster of Beyonce.

Love is a matter of chemistry, sex is a matter of physics.

Whenever I hear someone died of natural causes, I think, “Wait a minute. I have that.”

Most of us get into advertising for the money. Me? I’ve just always had a passion for making people feel bad

Never call a woman fat An elephant never forgets.

NOBODY TELLS ME WHAT TO DO! Except my government, boss, his wife, my girlfriend, my parents, my doctor, friends, neighbours, their dogs…

Why do vegetarians give good head? Because they are used to eating nuts!