Relationship between men and women is psychological. She is psycho and he is logical.

How on earth can you defend a man like Adam Johnson? it’s easy, he’s all left foot – just constantly show him down the right side and don’t let him cut in.

What’s the best thing about Switzerland? I’m not sure, but the flag is a big plus.

Is anyone on Twitter named Sarah Connor? If so, where do you live? Nothing to worry about, just a simple survey for my neural net processor.

I used to be able to stay out much later than this. I find I just can’t any more. My phone battery just doesn’t have the stamina any more.

What can a duck do that a lawyer can’t? Shove its bill up its ass.

My friend told me a joke about alarms I thought it was a snooze.

I’m sorry I stabbed all your tires, but in my defense you flirted with me and then said you were just kidding.

Donald trump The last American president was black, polls suggest that the next president will be Donald trump….. Huh. I guess orange is the new black

I’d just like to thank the sidewalk For keeping me off the streets