*bursts into church* DONT MARRY THAT WOMAN … Undertaker: “This is a funeral” … OKAY WELL IT STILL HOLDS TRUE, DONT MARRY HER

If there’s one thing everybody can agree on, no there isn’t.

How does Jackie Chan karate chop things over there? AYA!!

I’d rather have a bottle in-front-of-me … than a frontal lobotomy.

Why did the arsonist get kicked off the basketball team? He kept getting pyro-technicalities.

What did the shy pebble wish for? That it could be a little bolder!

I hate adjectives Because they’re terrible! _()_/

Let’s bring back the word HOOTENANNY

What do you call a person who is a bit of a jew? Jew-ish

How did Harry Potter get down the hill? By walking. Jk rowling