What is the easiest way to weigh your head? Ask assistance from ISIS.

A mathematician was constipated, how did he solve his problem? He worked it out with a pencil and paper.

“Huh?” – Wonder Woman

You’re not a mistake. Mistakes can be fixed. You’re hopeless.

Why are all updates to Apple stuff piratical? Because they all involve iPatches.

According to my FitBit, last week I burned 23 calories and my Ex’s house.

How do you find the click bait audience?

I don’t answer unexpected knocks on the door in case it’s the beginning of a very polite Zombie Apocalypse.

A lot of kids these days don’t even want to be sailors… …but it’s just so easy to give in to “pier” pressure.

IT Jokes 3 Database SQL walked into a NoSQL bar. A little while later, they walked out… Because they couldn’t find a table.